My body image

My body image

Avatar of AJ

My body image


June 22, 2011 in Uncategorized

How I felt about my body image was a lot different when I was little compared to now. I am a guy and like all guys I wanted be big and strong. I had high self esteem my whole life but I didn't always understand why I was so skinny and light. People used to tell me I was lucky that I'm this skinny but I didn't want to be lucky. I wanted to be bigger than I was. But the truth was I could only eat so much before; one i would get too full, and two I would eat more than my body could handle. This was one of the key reasons why I usually ate more than what I was suppose to few times (Not often but when I did know it was for that reason). I mean who doesn't want to be buff? I would look at kids my age and they would weigh like 10 or 20 pounds more than me. My only strength was I could run faster than most of them. The other advantage I had was I was tall. When I was into sports that was when it really hit me. I was playing football with my friends all the time and I would be nervous that I would get hurt. Then I joined football (Yeah I would never give it up because I loved sports) it wasn't as bad as I thought because I went in knowing it would be rough. But this is when I finally understood it all (about 8th grade). I am not going to be a big guy and I shouldn't be ashamed of it. I weighed 125 pounds in 8th grade but I almost stopped growing. I kept eating as much veggies and food as I could to get me bigger but my body was not meant to get bigger. I realized that what am I trying to accomplish with this? I asked myself am I ashamed of my body? I realized then I was proud of my image. I am not too skinny but not too big. I'm not too tall but not too short. I am not meant to be Arnold Schwarzenegger. I am now 16 years old and I'm 5'9 138 pounds. My doctor told me I am not only average size and weight but have been my whole life. My body has been on the right track and growing ever since I was 4 years old. So I do feel lucky now and have high self esteem.
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