The past is the past

The past is the past

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The past is the past

December 4, 2011 in Uncategorized

Well I’m baaaack, sorta. Did ya miss me??? Well in my time gone I managed to crash two computers in less than two weeks. I probably won’t get a working one back for at least one more week. I also took a mini-vacation the week of Thanksgiving to visit my brother and his family in Wisconsin and I enjoyed it a lot. So how was everyone else’s holiday? I guess back to business. My topic today is “the past is the past.” Now as a first generation PKUer that tern is slightly beginning to annoy me. Believe me I am a stern follower of “forgive and forget” and “starting from square one”, however, in some cases no matter how hard you try sometimes you can’t turn a blind eye to what has happened way back when. We must remember the things that happen to a person, no matter if they are a PKUer or not, shape your life (how you live it and your outlook). My past, by nature, dictates how I chose to live now. Either I can choose to change the patterns of the past or stay in that rut. Like my PKU, I know how being off-diet feels and being on-diet feels, I have chosen to change the “off-diet” factor in my life and return. There are those that say then let that be that, don’t “whine” and “complain” about what happened before. Well, frankly, some people need to air that stuff out and seek others that will let them vent ---venting is part of the process of getting over it. I.E. the dietician at the PKU Clinic I attended from the time I was about 2 years old until about 30 years old told me she was not willing to help me when I approached her about returning to my diet the last time and she abruptly told me I was a lost cause and she was not willing to help me. I she stood firm, I contacted her about what new formulas I could try she said I don’t even what dosages you should have I guess just guess. I contacted her about a Kuvan trial and she told me wasn’t gonna happen she was focusing on serious people. Now I guess I may just me a softy, but if a person reaches out a hand for help you should do your best to help them and pray and how thing time it sticks, I must confess this way of life has had me burned more than once, but seeing and helping my older cousin finally overcome his addictions and come to the Lord kept me still feeling this way, even after most of my family had given up on him and he constantly tells me you and your mom’s persistence paid off (there is no feeling better than seeing something like that happen). I digress, I decided to scrap that clinic saying they are the past and I needed to go full steam ahead to my future and seek out the other PKU Clinic in my area. Everybody must remember every PKUer does not have that advantage, they have to keep going to the people that at one time harmed them emotionally and an emotional scar is a hard one to get over. But I find myself having to address the past and the things I have done to my brain and body. I plow ahead but must patch, repair, and adapt to the troubles my years off-diet have done. So, “the past is the past” is a nice theory (lots of things were good in theory) but honestly sometimes that is just not the way it goes, no matter, how hard a person pushes forward. Now, don’t get me wrong parents & young PKUers the issues I have are not particularly issues you or your children will have. I you should operate under the assumption that everything will be good and alright, until otherwise told. Own your health. I OWN mine –I reflect the damage done to me ultimately was not done by someone else taking me off-diet I did it to myself. Learn from my bumpy road. Be thankful you live in a time that, even though it’s hard to be different –differences are accepted and celebrated. Frederick Perls - “I do my thing and you do yours. I am not in this world to live up to your expectations, and you are not in this world to live up to mine. You are you and I am I, and if by chance we find each other, then it is beautiful. If not, it can't be helped.”

3 Reviews of The past is the past

  1. Registered: Aug 11, 2009

    Posts: 0

    , Utah

    Mmmkay! First off I love this blog. Cause well i have the same issue with MY dietician also my doctor. I have had the same Dietician all my life and she is a hag. My doctor came into my life when i was 13. There stuck on how i acted when I was 6 to 16 years old.. thinking that I am still a little braty girl.. They dont take there time with me at all. I called my dietician when i found out i was pregnate asking for help first thing she says Well that doesnt suprise me that yyour pregnate! what “doctor” says that??!! I waited 3 and a half hours waiting for my first pku and pregnacy appt. I was excited I had paper to write down everything! They saw me for 10 mins!!! they said take your blood, eat low, drink your milk, and dont eat candy or drink soda or juice. ( my doctor is a freak about junk food, he calls me fat cause of it) So i thought easy enough.

    I had perfect levels the higest was an 11 lowest was -2 . by my 14th week My dieticaian came in sat down said my baby had brain damage, and blamed it on me. Told me it was my fault. She told me that i dont listin to what she and my doctor says. she then explains to me how when you have a level of 11 for the baby it dubbles…so 22 i told her that i didnt know that cause no one told me that. She then said well khyrsten maybe dont get pregnate when your not on your diet and your baby wont have to suffer… yeah made me feel like shit…

    at 18 weeks we had to give up our baby… she had a 20% chance of making it full turm… To this day I will not have anything to do with them. I Honestly think they didnt care about me and call me crazy but it felt like they were punshing me… So i do belive what you say when the past is the past… people need to let go! Cause others suffer for it.

  2. Registered: Feb 2, 2010

    Posts: 0

    Palmerston North, INTERNATIONAL

    Both of you, speedysangel and pkugurl99 are an inspiration, thankyou for sharing your stories about your past i’m glad to know I’m not the only one who has trouble with docters sometimes. I feel horrible that you were treated so when you made an effort to get back on diet for your baby pkugirl99, you and your child shouldn’t have had to go through that, your baby had a chance to survive and it is unfair that lack of attention took that chance away. It makes me mad that both of you were treated so badly!
    I have a Doctor who didn’t advocate diet-for-life, I’m not sure if he still doesn’t, however he accepts that both me and my older brother wish to stay on diet our whole life and after some initial arguments with my parent the topic is mostly left alone except for a comment every now and then to remind that going off-diet is there as an option, i tend to ignore when that is said or politely explain that I would much rather stay on diet, no matter how much more expensive some travel overseas may be cos of my formulas, and I am supported in that decision.

  3. Registered: Jul 16, 2009

    Posts: 0

    Kansas City, Kansas

    I’m glad to hear from u guys. thank you for sharing some of ur stories.

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